Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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