Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
