all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
