He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
