Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
