Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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