He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
