We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
