Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize