You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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