Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
We don't watch enough power rangers
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
