It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
