Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
