Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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