my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
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