Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
