did you get engaged???
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
