Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
