Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Boobs speak an international language.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize