Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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