Michael Bay diarrhea
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Randomize
