I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
