What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Randomize
