I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
