I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I need a burrito and a hug.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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