Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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