Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
