well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
