Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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