walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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