Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
