Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
