you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
