do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
