This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
