oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
