HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
