it hurts more in the daytime
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
