saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
