Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
