yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
