her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
