for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
