if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Randomize
