I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
