I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
