THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Randomize
