Cold hands, warm shart.
is your mom at the bar?
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
