that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
