Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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